Merry Prankster Sign Scrabble: A Photo Essay

This is a small but vital public service that civic-minded, queer, middle-aged, has-been journalists provide for the betterment of society-at-large. You're welcome :)

 What you have here is an abomination against nature, an insult to civility as we know it. Something must be done to put a stop to such heresy before children see it and start accepting it as normal. We usually attack under cover of darkness, but desperate times call for desperate measures. This hostile transgression against all that is right in the world demanded that we throw caution to the wind and take swift and decisive action in broad daylight. There is a culture war, and we're picking sides….. Our calculations determined that I should be the bottom and my co-conspirator the flyer because I outweigh her by 30 pounds. What we overlooked was that….. ….neither one of us was ever a cheerleader, so I promptly dropped her on her ass. This was not part of the plan. I think we accidentally smushed a dormant beach rose, which is a violation of Merry Prankster Environmental Preservation Policy (MPEPP). Yup, that's me rockin' that size 10 badonkadonk, a veritable marvel of gravity defiance, like staring at the sun, and in the twerk ready position, aww yeah….. I finally summoned a surge of Wonder Twins Power/fat ass prime sprinter watts and we got down to business…..and Kim Kardashian can only wish her bootay was that fly….. Girlfriend may be svelte, but in a clutch situation she's no Johnny Manziel, if you catch my drift. When crunch time was upon us, she was laughing so hard she was rendered incapable of spelling any better than the 'roided out bros at the gym, even though she's the one with the overpriced English degree. Not to worry, though, I have surgical precision and laser-like focus…..

. It sure is an awkward way for one of your queer grammar Nazi friends to flush out that you're a top, but like I said, I always step up under pressure….

She didn't drop me either, so mad props for that…..

Merry Pranksters Sign Scrabble: making the world a better place, one grammatical correction at a time. You're welcome, bitches….